Jun 05 2012

Spam Narrative

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For a while, I was receiving e-mail spam with little couplets at the bottom of them.  They were rather odd, so I’ve gone back through my inbox, to see if I could piece the whole story together. They seem to have started arriving around the end of February, with the most recent installment a few minutes ago. Here they are, in chronological order.

For some reason, as I read these, I hear Stephen Hawking’s “voice” in my head. If Stephen Hawking’s vocoder were to write erotic fiction dedicated to the Emergency Broadcast System recording, I suspect it would go

And fall in love with the dark side of her the.
When you see boobs?, it means that take ceases to exist.

And then. the dark side of her couldn’t.
Still curb her from Kit, question her screen with only.

Henry, the friend of Henry and leaves with Pull.
Indeed, forgot boogie Bar?.

Now and then, Bar? compete with day?.
Cristina, although somewhat soothed by brunette? and joystick!.

things happened so much clunkier under way, to stay eternally Vigilant,
things happened so much clunkier under way, to stay eternally Vigilant,

primary function of a bathtub with respect wave that enchanted continent in

still alive. B message in The operating procedure taking of The usual. Consider
necessarily that two way I have more Lucid has involves a certain employee

When you see working, it means that where feels nagging remorse.
behind reads a magazine, and throws starts reminiscing about lost glory; however, behind plan an escape from..

Still take a peek at her from throw, ignore her your with day?.
Noel, the friend of Noel and sweeps the floor with Well.

Furthermore, take rejoices, and bar. find lice on don.
If square sanitize cells, then behind wakes up.

When boobs? room., out music..
Now and then, Pull Johnny, bar..

working hibernates, and boobs? prays; however, Well can be kind to..
cell borrow money from tissue.

When you see tampon, it means that tissue meet.
Any ocean. can teacher day?, but it takes a real rolled to about.

Now and then, brunette? married? tampon.
Most standing believe that bad who miniskirts.

box., your, and you? are what made America great!
When about flies into a rage, joystick! starts reminiscing about lost glory.

Sometimes Kat laughs out loud, but minutes! always learn a hard lesson from day?!
When joystick! is magnificent, Kit assimilate pin.

Still who her from only, explains, her throw with working.
pencil. biting Kat, Uzi. Kit see. Bar?.

But they need to remember how hair, grenade hassle.
Furthermore, bad came, and don says. forgot.

For example, working indicates that day? figure? day?.
Sometimes Kat lady, but white always shoots minutes!!

Now and then, white learn a hard lesson from bad.
He called her Peter (or was it Peter?).

Elma and I took only (with your, behind.
The stammers, minutes!.

Now and then, Bar? eat forgot.
day? rejoices, because boobs? prefer back.

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