Jun 05 2012

Spam Wisdom

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At the bottom of a spam I just got… in tiny 1 point font, I found the following information.

I am debating printing this out, making several copies, and pasting it up around town.

May it transform you as it has me:

Hermits are twice as good as extraterrestials. Judges will someday become the mad scientists Copy machine repairmen sing sweetly to crybabies. Self-proclaimed “experts” secretly love junkies. Pianists are similar to English students. According to so-called ” men “, baseball pitchers just aren’t happy with mailmen. In the dark of night the swashbucklers secretly admire the insurance agents. Men deny the existence of condominium owners. Caribou slap Texaco managers. Old maids worship turtles. Uncles will crush all the shoes! Seismo-zombies have always loved, and always will love, the dinosaurs. Copy machine repairmen are from outer space, say the village elders. True or false: millionaires are insulted if you call them farmers. Witches are bemused by businessmen. Liberal arts majors are looking for cannibals. Children hope to gain the favor of district attorneys. Rolfers like to watch operas about people named “Davis”. Gas station attendants burst into tears if they see bookworms. Hospital patients applaud the people. Caribou are from outer space, say the Pepsi distributors. Pirates wave their hats at girl scout leaders. Mailmen deny that mirages remind me of poodles. Rumor spreads that the painters are ready to negotiate with the flatworms.Racing car drivers divorce dairy products. Sanitary engineers have nightmares of Yankees. Rodents debate with karate instructors. Queen bees disappoint the city dwellers. Garbagemen refer to themselves as hypnotists!! Did you know that Europeans massage condominium owners? Why do secretaries think that the mimes donate their bodies to human beings? Uncles shout imprecations at Trekkies.

I read in the Lycos newsletter that bestselling authors fight over the hippies! Why do you deny that the marsupials are believed to be psychoanalysts? Locked in the safety of their bathrooms, square dancers maintain that fast food cooks punish worms.Amphibians blame the geniuses. Bears are suspected of being interns. Only fools believe that politicians cannot understand pacifists. Heathens collect the souls of poets. Technicians disappoint the PH.D. candidates! Car owners pretend to be elephant trainers. City dwellers spit upon sidewalks. Quacks pity the hippies.Librarians spy on guys.

Young couples want to rid the world of podiatrists. Why do you deny that the opera singers long for people named “Davis”? According to so-called “hominids “, horses educate the pirates . Why do tenors insist in believing that civil servants are allergic to students? Did you see the PBS documentary about executives which claimed that children are often described as magicians? Children are very motherly towards women! Cat lovers spy on parasites. Why do hard rock geologists deny that the mailmen remind me of tax collectors? Cyborgs secretly admire subterraneans.Was it the topologists who told me that the bookworms show contempt for termites? Fathers search Yahoo for sites on quacks. Old-timers, for the most part, believe judges prefer to be called VCR owners. Technicians follow the herds of Sumo wrestlers. Ants sing sweetly to ghouls. Queen bees were raised by flatworms. Ants claim that the seismo-zombies pander to the whims of milkmen.

Did you know that ballroom dancers hunger for English students? Bugs absolutely, positively hate the sheep. Slime balls wish to please the male chauvinist pigs. Fools torture bugs. Monks laugh it up with panthers. Wives gaze wistfully at television personalities. Of course, say the secretaries, AOL users shall become the next employees. Amphibians blame the geniuses. Bears are suspected of being interns. Only fools believe that politicians cannot understand pacifists. Heathens collect the souls of poets. Technicians disappoint the PH.D. candidates! Car owners pretend to be elephant trainers. City dwellers spit upon sidewalks. Quacks pity the hippies.Librarians spy on guys. Hermits are twice as good as extraterrestials. Judges will someday become the mad scientists Copy machine repairmen sing sweetly to crybabies. Self-proclaimed “experts” secretly love junkies. Pianists are similar to English students. According to so-called ” men “, baseball pitchers just aren’t happy with mailmen. In the dark of night the swashbucklers secretly admire the insurance agents. Men deny the existence of condominium owners. Caribou slap Texaco managers. Old maids worship turtles. Uncles will crush all the shoes! Seismo-zombies have always loved, and always will love, the dinosaurs. Copy machine repairmen are from outer space, say the village elders. True or false: millionaires are insulted if you call them farmers. Witches are bemused by businessmen. Liberal arts majors are looking for cannibals. Children hope to gain the favor of district attorneys. Rolfers like to watch operas about people named “Davis”. Gas station attendants burst into tears if they see bookworms. Hospital patients applaud the people. Caribou are from outer space, say the Pepsi distributors. Pirates wave their hats at girl scout leaders. Mailmen deny that mirages remind me of poodles. Rumor spreads that the painters are ready to negotiate with the flatworms.Racing car drivers divorce dairy products. Sanitary engineers have nightmares of Yankees. Rodents debate with karate instructors. Queen bees disappoint the city dwellers. Garbagemen refer to themselves as hypnotists!! Did you know that Europeans massage condominium owners? Why do secretaries think that the mimes donate their bodies to human beings? Uncles shout imprecations at Trekkies.True or false: millionaires are insulted if you call them farmers. Witches are bemused by businessmen. Liberal arts majors are looking for cannibals. Children hope to gain the favor of district attorneys. Rolfers like to watch operas about people named “Davis”. Gas station attendants burst into tears if they see bookworms. Hospital patients applaud the people. Caribou are from outer space, say the Pepsi distributors. Pirates wave their hats at girl scout leaders. Mailmen deny that mirages remind me of poodles. Rumor spreads that the painters are ready to negotiate with the flatworms.Racing car drivers divorce dairy products. Sanitary engineers have nightmares of Yankees. Rodents debate with karate instructors. Queen bees disappoint the city dwellers. Garbagemen refer to themselves as hypnotists!! Did you know that Europeans massage condominium owners? Why do secretaries think that the mimes donate their bodies to human beings? Uncles shout imprecations at Trekkies. I read in the Lycos newsletter that bestselling authors fight over the hippies! Why do you deny that the marsupials are believed to be psychoanalysts? Locked in the safety of their bathrooms, square dancers maintain that fast food cooks punish worms.Amphibians blame the geniuses. Bears are suspected of being interns. Only fools believe that politicians cannot understand pacifists. Heathens collect the souls of poets. Technicians disappoint the PH.D. candidates! Car owners pretend to be elephant trainers. City dwellers spit upon sidewalks. Quacks pity the hippies.Librarians spy on guys. Hermits are twice as good as extraterrestials. Judges will someday become the mad scientists Copy machine repairmen sing sweetly to crybabies. Self-proclaimed “experts” secretly love junkies. Pianists are similar to English students. According to so-called ” men “, baseball pitchers just aren’t happy with mailmen. In the dark of night the swashbucklers secretly admire the insurance agents.Young couples want to rid the world of podiatrists. Why do you deny that the opera singers long for people named “Davis”? According to so-called “hominids “, horses educate the pirates . Why do tenors insist in believing that civil servants are allergic to students? Did you see the PBS documentary about executives which claimed that children are often described as magicians? Children are very motherly towards women! Cat lovers spy on parasites. Why do hard rock geologists deny that the mailmen remind me of tax collectors? Cyborgs secretly admire subterraneans.Was it the topologists who told me that the bookworms show contempt for termites? Fathers search Yahoo for sites on quacks. Old-timers, for the most part, believe judges prefer to be called VCR owners. Technicians follow the herds of Sumo wrestlers. Ants sing sweetly to ghouls. Queen bees were raised by flatworms. Ants claim that the seismo-zombies pander to the whims of milkmen. Termites run circles around the fanatics. Blenders scare the pants off of savants. Junkies vanquish the Amway distributors. Termites are ready to negotiate with the illegal aliens! Civil engineers travel far to see bankers. Perot held up a chart labelled “auto mechanics ” and claimed that high school students disregard the Texans. Engineering geologists are suspected of being bowlers. Was it the policemen who told me that the bears join pyramid schemes with phlebotemists? At the impeachment hearings, it was generally concluded that rolfers go for the notary publics. Horses gaze wistfully at eskimos. I know for a fact that the artists will never employ Aggies. Why do dance therapists insist in believing that pigs panic the nuclear physicists? Janitors eat goblins. Seismo-zombies may be dogs. Auto mechanics entertain people. My actors frighten reflection seismologists. In the dark of night the civil servants say nasty things about Democrats. Senators viciously malign the lawyers. Health food fanatics do not trust scholars. Cadets devour creationists! Lion tamers taunt jockeys. Conservatives go for the jerks. Tourists court district attorneys. Did you know that ballroom dancers hunger for English students? Bugs absolutely, positively hate the sheep. Slime balls wish to please the male chauvinist pigs. Fools torture bugs. Monks laugh it up with panthers. Wives gaze wistfully at television personalities. Of course, say the secretaries, AOL users shall become the next employees. Amphibians blame the geniuses. Bears are suspected of being interns. Only fools believe that politicians cannot understand pacifists. Heathens collect the souls of poets. Technicians disappoint the PH.D. candidates! Car owners pretend to be elephant trainers. City dwellers spit upon sidewalks. Quacks pity the hippies.Librarians spy on guys. Hermits are twice as good as extraterrestials. Judges will someday become the mad scientists Copy machine repairmen sing sweetly to crybabies. Self-proclaimed “experts” secretly love junkies. Pianists are similar to English students. According to so-called ” men “, baseball pitchers just aren’t happy with mailmen. In the dark of night the swashbucklers secretly admire the insurance agents. Men deny the existence of condominium owners. Caribou slap Texaco managers. Old maids worship turtles. Uncles will crush all the shoes! Seismo-zombies have always loved, and always will love, the dinosaurs. Copy machine repairmen are from outer space, say the village elders. True or false: millionaires are insulted if you call them farmers. Witches are bemused by businessmen. Liberal arts majors are looking for cannibals. Children hope to gain the favor of district attorneys. Rolfers like to watch operas about people named “Davis”. Gas station attendants burst into tears if they see bookworms. Hospital patients applaud the people. Caribou are from outer space, say the Pepsi distributors. Pirates wave their hats at girl scout leaders. Mailmen deny that mirages remind me of poodles. Rumor spreads that the painters are ready to negotiate with the flatworms.Racing car drivers divorce dairy products. Sanitary engineers have nightmares of Yankees. Rodents debate with karate instructors. Queen bees disappoint the city dwellers. Garbagemen refer to themselves as hypnotists!! Did you know that Europeans massage condominium owners? Why do secretaries think that the mimes donate their bodies to human beings? Uncles shout imprecations at Trekkies. I read in the Lycos newsletter that bestselling authors fight over the hippies! Why do you deny that the marsupials are believed to be psychoanalysts? Locked in the safety of their bathrooms, square dancers maintain that fast food cooks punish worms. Young couples want to rid the world of podiatrists. Why do you deny that the opera singers long for people named “Davis”? According to so-called “hominids “, horses educate the pirates . Why do tenors insist in believing that civil servants are allergic to students? Did you see the PBS documentary about executives which claimed that children are often described as magicians? Children are very motherly towards women! Cat lovers spy on parasites. Why do hard rock geologists deny that the mailmen remind me of tax collectors? Cyborgs secretly admire subterraneans.Was it the topologists who told me that the bookworms show contempt for termites? Fathers search Yahoo for sites on quacks. Old-timers, for the most part, believe judges prefer to be called VCR owners. Technicians follow the herds of Sumo wrestlers. Ants sing sweetly to ghouls. Queen bees were raised by flatworms. Ants claim that the seismo-zombies pander to the whims of milkmen.

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